We have a date... FINALLY!

September 4th, 2010!

Don't worry, save the dates will be going out here shortly especially since it's a holiday weekend, but of course those who may keep up with this little blogging adventure get to be the first to know!

When your farts scare you...

I'm sure I've had million and one things I could have wrote about since my last post, but I whenever I have a good idea I never write it down. Thus, perpetuating the random blog/lack of blog postings.... cycle.  By now I'm sure you have read the title and let me just put this disclaimer out there now: it's not about me!

I was sitting here tonight looking over my facebook with my two little fury friends cuddled up close to me (Yes, we have two dogs now. Looking back, I probably should/could have wrote a post about that....sorry!).  Then all of sudden I hear this little airy sound and then all of sudden Boston pops up. This fart, which had no real amount of sound at all scared the poor little guy right out of his peaceful slumber! Of course I start laughing him because I'm still eight years old and laugh any time anyone farts.... even at Brett in the middle of the night when he thinks I'm sleeping (he'll appreciate that I added that last part).  Unfortunately my laugh was interuptted when I got a whiff of this dog gas passage. Let me tell you, this little guy means business when he lets one go!

Well enough about dog farts. I'm sure you're really happy that you just lost two minutes of your life reading this post so I'll actually put some note worthy items here also! First off, I passed my third semester of nursing school.... Woot Woot!! Only two more left! Secondly, every one keeps asking me if Brett and I have set a date. We haven't. We have looked at a couple places and really like the place we looked at the other day down here in Southern Oregon. So once we come up with the deposit and get it booked we'll let the day out, but I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch. However, the minute we do get it finalized it'll be posted immediately!

Hope everyone has a Merry Christmas & a Happy New Year!!

My Letter From Santa

Well as you all know, I'm always the most well behaved, outstanding individual every year to make sure that jolly ol' St. Nick leaves lots of good presents under my tree. Every year around August or so, I sit down and contemplate what I will put on my list for the upcoming Christmas holiday. Then I write dear Mr. Claus a heart felt letter wishing him all the best during the busy months ahead and hope that he will be ever so generous as to stop my house for some milk and cookies, and of course to possibly leave some tokens of his appreciation for my good behavior. Usually I recieve a letter back around Thanksgiving saying how Santa can't wait to stop by and that he's been waiting all year for my famous triple-fudge chocolate chunk cookies. This year, however, my letter was a little bit later and a little bit grimmer. As a service to you I have enclosed this letter to let you know that Christmas might be a little less bountiful than it normally is, and all your hard work baking cookies and rounding up ol' Betsy to get fresh milk at ten o'clock on Christmas eve in three feet of snow, might not be worth it this year.


Sincerely,
Courtney
Disgruntled Christmas Citizen

To see the letter simply follow this URL.

http://despair.dgram.net/wailinglist/santaletter.pdf

(I tried to just post the letter with the post but it was taking to long and then I remembered I should probably get back to studying for my simulation final that's in the morning)

PS
This letter really came from my Wailing List news letter, but great little story right?!?

Turkey, Mashed Potatoes, and a Proposal :o)

As you may have heard/saw on Facebook, Brett proposed (insert super excited-ness here). Now many have asked about how it happened so I decided that this would be a perfect time to utilize my blog (and hopefully I'll keep up this trend now that I actually have something going on in my life).

The Story:

Thanksgiving day we were out at Brett's parents house and I was searching for my North Face fleece that had been MIA since the August camping trip (Brett's mom had picked it up for me). When I finally accepted the fact that I wasn't going to find it I walked back out into the dining/living room to join the clan. Apparently at that time Brett was showing everyone his master proposal plan. I walked in just in time to see him frantically close a book, which as he was closing three pages also flipped allowing me to see that there was a hole cut into this particular book. Of course this part was intriguing to me, who randomly has a book with a hole in it?! So I said, "Hey I want to see that." I was thinking that it was just one of his dads random things he had lying around the house. The conversation that followed went something like this:

Me-- "What's in the book?"

Brett-- "Nothing."

Me-- "I heard something shaking around in there."

Brett-- With a death-grip on the book, he shakes it, "See, nothing."

At that point I was just thinking it had something to do with a Christmas present Brett had said his mom was getting me, so I let it go for a little bit before I brought it up again with no success of course. Then we were out at Roy's (my soon-to-be step-dads) Mom's house and I brought up the whole book thing again because (1) I thought it was a funny story that I should share and (2) because it was just one more opportunity I could utilize to give Brett crap. Once again however, there was no success in finding out what was in this mysterious book.

After this we headed to my Dad's house to say bye and pick up Boston. Because of all the liquids that I had consumed I headed straight restroom when I walked in. Brett on the other hand went to check out my old room, which is right next to the bathroom I went to, to see the redecorating. When I walked out of the bathroom I saw that the light was still on in the room so I went to check things out. I walked in and Brett was sitting on the bed. He started rubbing his hand on the bed like he wanted me to sit on it and said, "They were right, this bed is really comfortable." Because I never pass up an opportunity to mess with him, I replied, "I bet it is," and then started walking back down the hall. I made it to the corner (like 8 feet or so) and then whipped around and ran back into the room and tackled him. He then pushed me off of him, got down on one knee, pulled out a little black box, and with a cute little grin on his face said, "Okay I'm gonna ask you now because you almost ruined it you butthole, will you marry me?"

Me-- "Yes! But I didn't mean to ruin it, you can wait and do your plan, you said you had a great plan!"

Brett-- "Well it's a little late now, and I just wanted it to be everything and more that you expected it to be."

Me-- "Well then just wait and do it, and you can do your plan."

Brett-- "I kind of already did it, and you still haven't gave me an answer."

Me-- "I already said Yes, sorry, I think it was jumbled in there with me trying to save your plan."

Then we both hugged and kissed and all that mushy stuff. Then I made him tell me everything that had gone on. Apparently he had already asked my dad like a week or so before and his mom already knew because she had called him while he was buying the ring. His original plan had been to cut a hole in the book, put the ring inside, wrap it up, and have me open it up on Christmas. When I first saw the book at his parent's house, he was showing his family his secret plan... and then I walked in. While we were out at Roy's mom's house, I had walked out to get my sister her birthday present. When I was out doing that he pulled my mom outside to ask her for her blessing told her to ask Roy. I thought it was a little suspicious when Roy pulled Brett down to play a game of pool and closed the door behind them, but apparently this is when they talked about it. Sometime during this my brother, sister, and her boyfriend also found out, and so by the time we made it to my Dad's, Brett had made the mastermind decision that with so many people in the know and me hot on his trail, there was no time like the present.

Now some of you may have read this and thought it wasn't to great, but let me tell you, I loved it. It was totally us, a hot mess :o) He was totally cute and it was just us and he even called me a butthole.. hahah... Which means it's totally meant to be!

The rock :o)

Stay tuned for information everything!

New Moon

So as you all know, I have been anticipating this movie for quite some time (May to be exact) and last night I finally got what I had been so impatiently been waiting for. Unfortunately I have to say, I was let down. I'm not sure if it's just because as I've grown up I've started to hate watching movies/shows with others because other people talk and squeal and scream, and that's distracting and if I'm going to pay to eleven dollars to watch some totally ripped seventeen year old take off his shirt (cough, cough, Taylor Lautner) I'd like to be involved in the show ;o) Or whether it was due to the fact that I had already read the book and knew what was going to happen.

Now to be quite honest, I don't read books for leisure, or for school for that matter, often and the Twilight series were the first books I had been totally engrossed in and by that I mean, for example, I read the New Moon in a week and Eclipse in three days and usually I'm lucky to finish a book (This was up until the fourth one which I finally had to hide in my closet so I would do homework... although it's probably not the best idea to hide a book from yourself because you know where it is...).

After seeing this movie I said to myself (and everyone I was with), "You SOOO need to read the book, it's so much better!" And let me tell you, I have never said this statement in my life. In fact, I only read the first two Harry Potter books because I thought the movies were better so I stopped reading the books so that I didn't know what was going to happen in the movies. Others have called me a fool for this, but I am quite content in being oblivious in regards to this area. Which led me to my assumption that maybe I didn't like it as much because I knew the ending already.

Whatever it is, I don't know, but I walked out of that theater slightly let down. However, I did remember that the first time I watched Twilight, I hated it and the second time I loved it. So maybe I just need to give New Moon another shot! ... I'll probably wait until it comes out on DVD though because I'm too cheap :O)

A Little Dinner Conversation...

Brett and I decided that at least once a week we need to go out and do something with just us, and that doesn't involve errands or any of that business. Since we hadn't been out to dinner in awhile we decided we would try some place new (well new for us anyway), The Old Spaghetti Factory. Let me tell you, we carbo-loaded it up!! So much for Brett's diet he's been attempting to be loyal to :O) After we were done with our dinner and waiting for our ice cream, Brett made a little comment and this was the conversation that ensued...

Brett: Why does everything that tastes so good to you have to be so bad for you?

Me: I don't know, but one day it'll all go straight to my ass.

Brett: No babe, it's going to become your ass.

Me: But I'm sure you won't complain.

Brett: Nope!

He just knows all the right things to say doesn't he?!

We're Moving!

A few months after I moved into my apartment I knew I wanted to move. Screaming kids right outside your window when you're trying to sleep after working graveyard will do that to you. Unfortunately I signed a year lease so I had to wait quite some time before that dream would become a reality. Well pretty much since Brett moved in we've been looking forward to moving and finding a place that is ours and possibly a place to call home until we actually buy one. Times being the way they are, as things got closer we were starting to think we weren't going to be able to pull off a move, and even knowing that Brett was still combing Craigslist. Well Monday (as he had pretty much everyday) Brett emailed this house that sounded perfect. It was bigger than what we needed but in our price range and in the area we want to be in. I told him if he wanted to look more into it, he could call them and see if it was even still available and get more info on. Well he called and it was still available, so I set up an appointment to go view it. The unfortunate part was that Brett couldn't go to see it until the weekend because of his work schedule. Yesterday I met the lady in charge, Karen, to see the place and I have to say the pictures didn't give it credit. Since Brett couldn't go I was supposed to take pictures and then email them as soon as I got home. The funny part: I was so wrapped up in the place that I forgot until we were walking out and then was running around like a crazy person trying to snap a few shots.

After I left I called Brett and told him how great it was and said that I had told Karen we would get back to her tomorrow with our decision and that we could just talk about it when he got home. After a few more minutes of conversation we both knew we wanted it so I called her back immediately and told her we would be filling out applications and I would get them to her first thing this morning, which I did. After numerous phonecalls throughout the day and my apartment that I'm currently in trying to pull whatever they could even though our lease is up at the end of the month.... and we finally got the call around five that we are approved! The best part is that part of the deal they were doing was free rent for July (which is another reason it was perfect) so we can start moving in ASAP.

Although I would love to start this weekend, especially since I have the week off from school, we had already made plans to go camping and take a little break from the everyday. So next weekend we move! Maybe in the mean time I'll figure out a way to get some hot mover guys to do it for me and for free.... Let me know if you know anyone :O)

I Don't Get It When....

As Brett and I were driving back from South County tonight I saw a hitchhiker, and it reminded of this recurring thought I have when I see this particular brand of road warrior hoofing it down the highway. My thought is: Why is it that when, let's say you're driving south, you pass a guy with a sign that says "Need Ride South" or something like that, but instead of walking the way they say they're going, they're walking north!! I just do not understand it! Wouldn't you want to walk the way you say you're trying to get to?!? Maybe these are those creepy hitchhikers that everyone warns you not to pick up!

Hahah.. I have no idea, but I just thought I might share this with the world and make you just as confused as I am! ...or at least overthink things like I do :o)

My New Obsession...

I have to admit when my sister told me a few years ago I needed to read the Twilight books because they were "the best books EVER!" I heard what she said (because she has a habit of picking pretty good books), but didn't follow her suggestion mainly because I really don't read unless I have to. Well then she told me I needed to watch the movie... I still wasn't too excited about it (I think because subconciously I knew the blackhole that I could be sucked into) but I decided to give it a shot. The first time I watched the movie, I'll have to admit it was hard to sit and pay attention to. The whole way through it I was thinking, "I don't really like this movie." But then at the end, when the credits started rolling, I had this epiphany--"Man! I really liked this movie!!"

Then a snowball effect ensued. I decided I should read the book to see the differences and whether I would like it or the movie better. I didn't hold out much hope for the book because typically I like the movies way better than the books (yes, I'm that person!). But after getting through the first few chapters I ordered the other three books (I might add that I found some awesome discounts) to make sure I would have them on hand so there wouldn't be any breaks in the story lines.

Now at first I wasn't the obsessed Twilight fan. My mind could function and I could get a normal amount of sleep, etc. But then the MTV Movie Awards occured. They showed a preview of New Moon, which for those of you that don't know is the 2nd movie in the Twilight series. After watching that my fan-ness was kicked into overdrive. I finished the second half of Twilight (the first book) during a day at the pool.. what could be better than enjoying a good book poolside, cabana boy included?! Then I immediately started into the second book and finished all 546pgs in 5 days. Surprising only because I'm not a recreational reader! This led to many late nights of reading (the book would get so exciting that I would try to go to sleep, but then I just had to know what happened so I would go "okay I can read another chapter before I go to sleep" three hours later....). In between all this I was watching the movie (four times last week), googling to try to find more info, trying to find other scenes or trailors from the movie, watching the current movie trailor over and over... etc. (I told you this was getting weird!)

So now I'm in the beginning stages of reading Eclipse (the third book) and I'm trying to take it slow because there is only one more book left... although I did find a copy of another book to be included in the series but it was leaked out and then author was pissed and put it on hold indefinitely, put posted a copy of the draft. The movie comes out 11.20.09 and pretty much every other day I think to myself... "I don't know if I'm going to make it until then!"

But yes, so now you know my dark side ;o) Also you should totally check out the book/movie (but the book is way better!! See! Now i'm not one of those people!)

For those of you who haven't seen the new trailor---

An Epic Car Ride..

This trip to L.A. definitely got started off on the wrong foot.  Actually at first everything was going peachy! Dre and I were making super good time, there was tons of random car dancing, I had just saw a sign for a town called Los Banos (yes I have a picture of the sign but I'm not on my computer and this one doesn't have a card reader.. hopefully soon I can get it posted though), etc.  So I'm driving, and all of sudden I hear what sounds like a flat tire on the front right (which I had previously ran up on a side walk with).  I then proceeded to turn the music down, and started looking around for a place to pull over, but there was no where.  The shoulder was slim to none, but we could see an exit coming up so we thought we could make it (since we had no idea where we were).  Then all of sudden the sound went away, so we were thinking okay we're good!  Wrong!! Our brief moment of relief was swiftly crushed when the back right tire blew out. It was pretty much all I could do to keep the car on the road (much less in my lane.. good thing no one was around).

Of course at this point we had no choice but to pull over.  The even more unfortunate part was that we still had no idea where we were at, so we figured we couldn't call AAA until we figured that part out.  The lucky part is I knew how to change the tire.  Oh but wait! We got even luckier! After I had thrown the all our bags into the briar bushes (yeah.. the side of the road was covered with them), got the spare out, and was getting ready to jack it up, this tow truck pulls over.  He asked if we had AAA, which even more lucky for us, I had just got my car in the mail the day I drove down from Portland.  So he changed the tire, but in the mean time he told us to call AAA.

Now I don't know if this makes sense to the rest of you, but why would you call AAA for a tow truck when you already have one?!?  But we called anyway and because we were in the middle of no where the call dropped literally five or six times.  After the guy had put the lovely doughnut on, I was filling out the paperwork, and he was explaining where we could go to get a new tire because oh yes! This tire didn't just go flat... No no.. it literally shredded! Awesome.....

So he's explaining, and I ask "So this is just right at the next exit?" Oh no... It was sixty miles down the road!  Seriously, I wasn't joking by saying we were in B.F.E. The only signs I had seen were for two state prisons and a mental hospital (comforting right?!).  So after receiving that little morsel of good news, I went back to the car where we decided that we should probably wait for the next tow truck driver to show up, because the first guy had told us to call and they had sent out another truck.  After thinking it over, we really didn't get the point of it, so we called to cancel but the call kept dropping so we just decided to wait for the next truck.  Then the first guy (who was still sitting there behind us) got back out and asked what we were doing. We explained and he said just go up to the next exit.  We followed his lead to the next exit because he needed some info from the AAA people anyway, and perfect for us, when he pulled into the turn out we were literally directly under these power lines.  No joke, we both felt like our brains were starting to boil.. But we did get the call canceled and then proceeded to drive sixty miles on a doughnut, driving 55 mph.

After a stressful hour or so drive of almost getting rear ended 24 times (there was no traffic until our top speed could only be 55 of course), we finally made it to the exit and the tire shop, and let me tell you--- it was like the sketchiest place EVER! It was one of those places that you pull up to and know you're going to get ripped off.  Oddly enough though, we got it fixed for cheaper than expected and in about 15 minutes-- Not bad! ... which should leave you to believe that this story isn't over yet... and it's not!

So we're driving and the car just seems a bit off and it's kind of making that flat tire sound, so we pull over again to check and nothing. But then it keeps happening.  So we stop at truck stop, get a tire gauge and check the air pressure.  One of the tires was off, so I added more air and thought the issue was solved.  No.  At that point we just decided that since none of the tires were flat and the car was still drivable, we would just get to my aunts and take it in to get looked at in the morning.  Well this morning my Uncle Tom and I were looking at it and I figured out that the tire those guys was a different size.. just a little bit bigger to be exact.  Are you kidding me?!!

But at this point we have been told that it's drivable, especially since it's on the back, so since it's not my car (and I've already bought one new tire for it), it can be dealt with when we get home! So this was just our first day... today has went much better.  We went to Venice--Awesome for people watching!  However, since I can't upload pictures at the moment I don't want to ruin it.  So later my friends, I will have more blogging updates for you!  For now, this is the end of my short novel :O)

It's Just My Style

Is it bad that when planning out writing a paper or even studying for a test, I plan in procrastination time?? I have been pondering this thought more and more the last couple weeks, especially with all the papers that have been due and now with it being finals week. Brett makes fun of me for it every time, and have even had my Dad give me some flack for it.

"So I thought you were writing your paper?"
"I am..."
"I can see you harvesting your crops on Farmtown!"
"Oops!"

The worst part is, that I'm totally unproductive when I'm at home. Take today for example. Has worked out pretty well in the studying department mainly because I'm sitting at the hospital while Brett is getting surgery, and we all know there isn't much to do here! Unfortunately, I opened up my computer for a "study break" and an hour later, here I am still on it!

Oh well! I wouldn't have gotten this fair in life if procrastination wasn't my style!

Easter Activities

Yes-- this post is definitely delayed! But better late than never!

Basically there's not much to say except--- For Easter, some people hunt eggs. In south county, we blow up teddy bears.

This little experiment involved a pound of tannerrite (some kind of explosive Brett's friend gave him), a water bottle of gasoline, a teddy bear, high powered rifle, and an accurate shooter. The result?????? Check out the video!

Before....

And After!

Pictures!

I told myself I couldn't go outside until I got my paper done (75 and sunny is the cause for this excitement), then I told myself I couldn't put up pictures until I got my paper and study guide done (which I did while sitting outside-- amazing!!). So the rest of you hand to suffer for my procrastination-- I apologize! But here are a couple of the prom pictures from this weekends festivities. Oh but first!! Friday night Brett and I were bored and I was looking through my stuff from the makeup class I took last year. Then Brett made the mistake of saying that I could paint his face like Gene Simmons.... So I did! :o)

Brett and Kailee (no he's not a creeper--she played on his basketball team last year)




My brothers from another mother-- Blake and Ryan

And finally! Robert and Miss Kailee

So it's official....

I'm the worst blogger ever! I have these great intentions and every day... or every other day.... I go through my day and think "Wow, I should write a blog about that!" I even have pictures of this one guy from Winco (Brett chased him out the door so he could get a picture). So my lack of blogging isn't from lack of thinking of it, it's more to do with poor time management and a knack for getting ridiculously sick. But hopefully I've gotten all the illnesses that have gone around and they will just stay away!

The spark for this little writing adventure was a comment made in my fundamentals class this morning. We were sitting there talking about medication administration (enticing subject at 8am.... okay, maybe not so much...) and all of sudden this kid opens the door and starts to walk in. Then he looked up and saw all of us staring at him and was like "Oops, this is not my class!" Now being as that we are two weeks away from finals, you would have thought this poor kid would know were his classes at this point in the game. Although I can't make too much fun of him because our whole class was sitting in the wrong classroom about a month ago... no need to worry about your future health care providers ;o)

But anywho! So this poor soul wonders into the wrong classroom, realizes it, then to make things even better Lorretta (our professor) says (as he's turning around to walk out), "Are you sure you don't want to learn about meds??" To which he replied, "Umm.. No thank you!" Then walked out and closed the door. Now most of you may be thinking, "Wow this story is really dumb, maybe she should just give up on this whole blogging thing!" Well the best is yet to come folks! Pretty much as soon as the kid had shut the door Lorretta goes, "Well he looks like he's on a few!"

We pretty much just all looked at each other wondering if it was okay to laugh, did she really just say that?!, etc. Then noticing all of us trying to figure out what happened, Lorretta continuted by saying, "Seriously though! Did you see his face?!?" Haha.. Pretty much amazing! I'd totally go with her but it was like 0900 when he walked in and who is going to walk up any earlier than they have to?? Not me!

Addition!!!

At the end of Regis and Kelly they read emails.. and some one emailed them about the naked bike ride. This girl said that she's been training for the last couple months for this... AND THEN!! (this is the best part) Suggested that Regis & Kelly join them out there... AND!! (it gets better!) Said that they ride on a tadum bike!! Pretty sure Kelly almost threw up!

Weiner Vehicles and Naked Bike Riders

Yes, I've been gone for awhile.... AGAIN... I apologize! School got crazy, work got crazy, and then last week was spring break and the only thing I could do on my computer was play Farm Town (Thanks for getting me hooked Laura!). Another dilemma was just that I had so many random stories to write on here, that I just couldn't decide which ones to put on and which ones to hold off on and all that good stuff.... although I know most of you are probably thinking "she just write the all" and if your name is Laura ;o) ... You might be thinking "I wish she would write them all so then I would have something to do while I'm waiting for my crops to grow!"

Okay so enough with my useless rambling... (if your name is Brett you're thinking "isn't this all useless rambling?!") Onto the stories of today... or I guess I should say stories of the hour, which is really weird how things are getting grouped together so much in the last 24 hours... like last night I thought I was going crazy cause I couldn't find my bottle of whip cream for my margarita that I knew I had bought the day before, then like five minutes later Brett dropped his margarita into my bag of freshly purchased clothes and accessories, then as I was cleaning that up I looked over and the dog had up-chucked... fun times! Good thing I still had carpet cleaner and spray & wash! But enough getting off subject---back to today!

So I got of class and it's raining like a mother up here (I was so happy I a somewhat close parking spot because I didn't wear my rain jacket and I have to much man pride to use an umbrella). So I'm driving home and I as I'm coming up 26 by the zoo I hit a ton of water and start to hydroplane and am thinking "Wow! This is gonna suck!" but I got everything back under control and then all of sudden I look in the East 26 lanes and I see none other than super awesome Wiener Mobile!! It was like the weirdest post-I-think-I'm-gonna-die moment EVER!! Unfortunately that four-wheeled wiener was hauling 50 mph in the opposite direction so I couldn't catch up with it to claim my free whistle, but next time!!

But then I got home and I was watching Regis & Kelly and all of sudden they start talking about the Eugene so my ears perked up, and then they continued to talk about the World Naked Bike Ride that had went through town and is traveling across the country. Let me say-- Kelly had some of the same questions I did! Like first-- Why in the heck would you want to do that?! ...to which Regis replied "Some I just want to be free!" Then she asked, "Well wouldn't you want a little bit of coverage down there to prevent chaffing?" and my personal favorite! "What if something gets stuck?!" I can't even imagine! Also! Did I mention that it was raining and in the mid-40's... No better way to fight against energy dependence than to ride naked in the cold!

So then I was thinking (cause sometimes...okay most times.. I have wierd thoughts) what if the wiener mobile was with the naked bike riders?!! Just have a the wiener mobile surrounded by a pack of naked riders--hahah! That would be probably the most amazing thing EVER!!

For your viewing pleasure I have tracked down the most appropriate picture I could find of this specticle!

OH AND THIS TOO!!!

In my theory class today....yes I know, I have lots of stories... blame Brett, he's out of town so I have no own to filter these through since I haven't really talked to him, so now you're getting all of it! So back to the story, in my theory class today we were talking about an Asian patient whose name is Hai (sounds like high). Well then the professor made the mistake of asking, "So what would you do if your patient was Hai?" Well I was trying to hold in my laughter, but I'm just that mature and few little chuckles got out... Oops!

More Tales From The Lab...

After participating in skills lab this week, I've decided that I just need to record it because with all the crazy things I write about I think everyone is going to start thinking that I made these things up. On the contrary my friends, all the events are true, thus leading to the reason why I have amazing abs--- I spend three hours laughing!

This weeks adventures were in learning abdominal and cardiac assessment. Now last week when we were doing lung assessment, Tyler (one of the guys in my class) was the guinea pig and had to take his shirt off in front of everyone so that Denise could demonstrate for everyone (we all had to eventually at least with our partners, well the ladies kept their bras on). So this week as soon as we split into two groups and our group went into the NP practice lab, he was like "I am not taking my shirt off in front of everyone this week so the rest of you guys better figure out who's doing it!" Well then Tyler made the mistake of walking out of the lab to go to the restroom. While he was gone, Denise came in and said "Okay so I need one of you boys to volunteer your upper body to us!" (It just so happened we had 4 people in our group of 10 were guys). Well we then discovered that the other three guys were a little on the hairy side and one of the girls mentioned that Tyler shaves his chest so as soon as Tyler walked back in Denise let him know that he once again had the privilege of baring his upper body to the rest of us. So he got set up on the examination table (they're just like the one's in the doctor's offices) and while he was getting set up she asked for two more volunteers, then she gave them two crayola markers (washable)... Well Tyler's chest and abdomen then started to look like a small child's coloring book, especially after the liver was drawn on the wrong side and had to be redrawn. Other organs that we're including in this new work of body art-- the uterus and fallopian tubes. Of course since it was two girls in charge of the drawing, they made sure to label these parts. Unfortunately my camera was dead so I couldn't get a picture but I'm sure you can picture this at least some what.

After we were drawing, we some how got into another conversation about saggy breasts...which then led into a conversation about elongated testicles.... It went a little something like this:
Denise-- "So you know how women get saggy breasts as they age, well that is due to an elongating of a tendon. Well gentlemen have the same thing, sort of, except the tendon that elongates with them deals with their testicles. So older gentleman, if theirs are elongated to much and they sit down on the toilet, their testicles touch the water, then they can have a heart attack and possibly die!" WOW! So now you're prepared if you ever end up in that situation! No need to thank me-- these stories are like my own free version of a PSA! Your welcome :o)

Correction

Because I hear so many stories from my lovely lab ladies, I found today that I had a few of their stories crossed up. The pulling out of the soft palette is still totally true. It was a story to teach us the importance of getting dentures out every day, otherwise the glue does its job a little to well. The part that had to do with flossing was this...

Denise had a patient that didn't like to floss and never did (this you know if you read the previous blog). Well this client developed an abscess... then this abscess got infected... then turned systemic (meaning it spread to the rest of his body)... and in the end it left him paralyzed!

So floss your teeth and add up to seven years to your life! ... Or don't and possibly end up paralyzed... no bueno!

More About The Lab Ladies

As with every Tuesday, yesterday was my simulation lab class for fundamentals, and again my lab professors were back on the crazy train.... okay well maybe not the crazy train but another one of the rants. So let me set this one up: We're sitting in the classroom, getting ready to go over our study guide, and all of sudden Denise (one of the professors) gets up and starts asking people if they flossed today. Now this goes back to a previous lab which I unfortunately did not report to you. During this particular class, Denise told us about one time she had a client who didn't floss and who also put in his dentures and didn't take them out for three days. The result: After they admitted him they were trying to get the dentures out and ended up pulling out his entire soft palette (sorry for those of you who are a bit squeamish)! So Denise's new thing is pushing flossing.

Now back to yesterday-- After she started individually calling on people to see if they had flossed she then proceeded to hand out floss to those who hadn't flossed yet today. However, a lot of hadn't yet (I like to do mine before bed) so she ran out of floss before she even made it half way around the class. She also made sure to let everyone know that flossing can add seven years to your life! So if your looking for a few extra years grab some floss and get on it! I think the most random part was when she said, "I like flick the stuff on the windshield while I'm driving, I mean that's what it's for right?!" I'm pretty sure we all said "EW!!!" at the same time.

Oh also in lab! So my ear has been killing me off and on for awhile now and last week it was especially bad, almost to the point that I was going to go to the doctor... of course I didn't because I pretty much hate going more than anything. So yesterday Shelan and I were messing around in lab.. surprise right?!... and they had the little ear lights sitting there so we asked Denise when we would get to use those. She said not until next year. Of course we were bummed so she took a second and showed us and while she was look at mine she confirmed that I'm not crazy and not a panzy (like someone said...cough cough.. Brett... Love you!). She said that I have an ear infection but its most likely viral so even if I went to the doctor and they gave me meds it would wipe out all my "friendly" bacteria and then it could just make life worse. So moral of the story: My not-wanting-to-go-to-the-doctors-ness finally paid off! And nursing school is a good investment-- saves money on healthcare!

OMG!! I was looking for a picture to add to this because... well I have been lacking in that department and I found these!! Enjoy :o)

The Most Anti-Climatic Situation EVER!

Yesterday I was at work, trying to go home and all of a sudden the activities coordinator runs into the med room and starts freaking out saying, "Oh my gosh! We have a resident, and there is blood... somebody needs to get out here quick!" Well at the time there were the two med aides who had just came on shift and me (who was trying to go home) standing there and as soon as she said that the other two just kind of stared at each other and me.... well being the blood loving nursing student that I am---I jump into action and said "Awesome!! I'm totally on it!!"

I grabbed the first aide kit and ran down to the activities room, the whole time preparing myself for massive amounts of blood, elderly people freaking out, etc. Did I find that??? Well by the title I'm sure you can guess that is the exact opposite of what I found. One of the caregivers and I ran into the room to find... duh-duh-duh!!! A 2cm skin tear with very minimal blood... so minimal that the client was able to clean it up with a tissue. I was not excited because I knew that because I found this I now had to fill out all the paperwork, make phone calls to family and her doctor, and chart. So I bandaged her up, even though she kept saying, "It's nothing really, I don't need anything..." Then I got to go through the long drawn out process of our redundant paper work, and calling family to assure them that nothing was wrong it was just procedure that I call, etc.

Finally I finish up and am ready to head home and then get suckered into another situation mainly due the fact that I am a nursing student, and because they know that I now get more responsibility... well within parameters. It's all good practice, don't get me wrong, but at the end of the day, when my shift and shift report are over I just want to go home!

Oh also! Since we're on the subject of school and this is pretty amazing I must mention that I was able to finish my 60 question pharmacology test in twenty minutes! Now hearing that you might expect that my performance might not be as well as could have had I spent more time on it. Well now I can tell you that my 2o second per question approach led to a 93%... pretty much amazing!!

Nursing Humor..

The first four weeks of nursing school have been.. well weird to say the least! I've come to find out that nursing is all about having really good stories to tell. I always thought the stories that Melissa told me were out there, now I have six different classes full of these stories. For instance, one of my professors was working an OB shift and this girl was getting ready to have her baby but she didn't know who the father was... not too uncommon these days, but it gets better! So usually in this situation it's usually between two people... NO! It was between FIVE different guys who were all in the delivery room because the way they were going to figure it out was by how the baby looked. So when the baby came out it had a full head of black hair which at that point left between the Mexican guy and the African American guy. When the rest of the little one made it's way into the world the it was apparent that the father was the African American guy. Well the Mexican guy wasn't too excited about that and started a fight with the African American guy and then the white guys joined in and.... well... security had to be called and all the guys were removed from the hospital.

Then for my skills lab I have these two off the wall crazy ladies. They are SO funny! Who knows how the come up with some of the things they say, but they definitely catch us all off guard all the time! Like the other day we're sitting there and they were asking who was going to the VA clinical this week and then one of them was like "Oh you're going to have so much fun washing testicles and penises!" ... umm yeah these ladies are off the wall!

But here is something to that can entertain everyone. One of the many teaching tools that was presented to us. We were all a little surprised by this one.. but after listening/watching it we were all singing it as we walked down the hall. So here you go!

Ode To Football Pants--

So watching the Super Bowl made me realize how much I love (love, Love, LOVE!) football pants!! Seriously! I mean once players get into college and pro's they are so muscular that those super tight pants just accentuate the hind region ;) haha! All I'm saying is if you have to watch something that really doesn't interest you too much, at least football allows you to look at yet another one of God's great inventions.... football pants :)

....Also comparable to wranglers at the rodeo :)

So in honor of this lovely apparel I've wrote a little something! Just remember-- I'm not famous for my poetry skills :)

Ode to Football Pants
Oh sweet football pants,
You form such a wonderful sight,
And now you've caused me to start a rant
On my blog tonight.

Big or small,
You never fall,
And you always hold on tight,

Sometimes when I'm down,
and wearing a frown,
I just turn on the game,
and praise your name!

Oh Sweet Drug Test!

All of my nursing school paperwork is due tomorrow, so I've spent the last two days running around town (..and getting lost) gathering up random paperwork, getting my CPR certification, a tetanus shot, and the always exciting drug test!

The part I hate most... okay thinking about it, lets say second most... is the fact that you're not supposed to drink anything four hours before hand... Seriously?!? I'm not sure I know a single person that follows this. Since I had a super long class this morning it made it easier for me to compile a sizable "specimen," although it was a VERY long ride and definitely not fun when I couldn't find the place. But I got there! With dry pants too... barely! The lady was super fast at setting up and gave me all the instructions and said, "Most importantly DON'T FLUSH!" I nodded, seemed like pretty simple instructions. Then she said "Good luck!" To which I responded, "Oh, I've been saving this for you all morning!"

So sit down to do my best at... well you know. The whole time thinking, there has got to better way for ladies to do this! So I started thinking up all these devices for such an activity, and before I knew it I was done! But all my thinking led me to make a crucial error.... I flushed the toilet! I broke the golden drug test rule! The lady had told me and there were signs everywhere, but in all my excitement of making millions off urine specimen collection, I just did what I always do and flushed. Fortunately, the lady checked the protocol for my school and there was nothing that said I had to redo it, but she did let me know that OHSU protocol states if you flush, you have to stay until they can gather another sample. Good thing U.P. skipped that part or who knows how long I would have been there!

So This One Time....

... I fell out of the shower. I mean every once in awhile you get tripped up on that whole side of the tub thing and the events that follow usually end with someone knocking on the door to make sure you're still alive because there is no way that the ear deafening thunder could mean survival! Well yesterday I topped my all time list of falling-out-of-the-shower-ness (and the fact that I even have a list is a statement in and of itself). During the wee hours of the morning I was doing my scrub-a-dub-dub deal and then I finished up and was reaching to grab a towel. After opening the shower curtain I noticed the door was open about a foot and my little four legged friend was sitting on the rug staring up at me. Because I knew that one of the roommates was still home I decided it would be a good idea to close said door in effort to maintain some privacy. In doing so I leaned out of the shower, put my hand on the towel rack and leaned out to close the door. Well mid-lean the towel rack gives out and I fall out of the tub, may have partially landed on the dog (still not sure if I actually did or not, but the little guy is doing just fine), and didn't get door shut. What I did accomplish though was my sprawled out, naked self, face down on the bathroom floor with my legs up still on the edge of the tub. Yeah, definitely not the best position for the whole privacy thing!

So because the roommate was still home, I jumped up really quick, shut the door, and got a towel on because I'm sure my thunderous fall not only woke him up, but possibly the neighbors below and maybe even above... Yes! It really was that loud! In order to keep him from knocking on the door I started making a bunch of noise so that he could tell I had survived the treacherous fall.

I know what you're think now............... What about the towel rack right?? Well fortunately it didn't rip out the wall! the bar just slipped out and I was about to get it back in with no trouble. And me-- Well I'm good to go! A bruise on the knees but I think considering what happened, I'll take a couple bruises! And the dog! Can't forget about him! Well he was acutely traumatized. After the fall he ran over by the sink and just stood there shaking, and wouldn't come near for like five minutes.... but honestly, can you blame him?

I'm Back!

As you all have figured out by now, I'm horrible at this blogging thing. I have good spurts, but those seem to followed by long periods of nothingness. Let's just say life has been crazy! I started nursing school two weeks ago (finally!), then add work to that, and a barrage of family members who decided to take a little vacation up here. Okay, so a hospital stay isn't quite the vacation anyone hopes for but everyone is back home, resting and recuperating... or so I hope!

Now onto the inspiration for my long overdue blogging attempt. I was sitting here watching "A Very Duggar Wedding", and for those of you who haven't had the chance to at least see a commercial about this I'll explain. The Duggar's are the family off TLC's "17 Kids and Counting" (Actually they just had their 18th so maybe they need to change the name of the show?!). Obviously they have A LOT of kids! They are VERY conservative, kids are home schooled, don't watch a lot tv, not too much time on the internet, etc. So this little wedding special was about their oldest son Josh who is getting married. The low down on this: They have yet to kiss and of course no sex. The whole part that got me was the no kissing... seriously??! So during their "courtship" they just hold hands... A LOT! Whatever floats your boat! I'll admit their much stronger people than I am! But onto the point of this! I was watching the show/doing some reading for class tomorrow and then all of sudden a commercial came on. It was the commercial for Plan B! Seriously?!?! Of all the shows to air that commercial during I would say this was definitely the definition of opposites! I think if they ever found this out the Duggar's (and the whole conservative community) would have a coronary! So there is your little laugh for the evening! I think I'm going to hit the sack, but hopefully I'll be able to keep up with this a little more frequently!

Oh! Just found out-- the show is getting changed to "18 kids and counting"